Dr. Nicole Ferguson says she used to become so irritated with other people because she automatically assumed the worse. She says if someone cut her off in traffic, she determined that it was because they wanted to upset her. Then someone suggested she create three alternative reasons for someone’s behavior or actions that have absolutely nothing to do with her. She says this helps to assess the situation with more clarity as opposed to jumping to the conclusion that provokes anger.
For instance, she says if someone cut her off in traffic, she would think of three other reasons they cut her off. For example, maybe they had a bad day at work; maybe they are rushing home to care for a sick relative or maybe they are a young driver that is just learning the rules of the road. Dr. Nicole says the next time you find yourself getting angry or upset with someone, think of three other reasons for their behavior that have absolutely nothing to do with you. She says try not to assume the worse in others and it will bring out the best in you.
Dr. Nicole Ferguson is the author of Unstoppable Joy.
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