BUFFALO, N.Y. (WKBW) — A weekend of remembrance is now underway, honoring the lives we lost one year ago when a gunman motivated by racist ideology, came to east Buffalo and opened fire on the Tops, on Jefferson Avenue.
In the last year, Tops Friendly Market officials have tried to take a horrific day and turn it into creating a purpose.
Tops president and Chief Operating Officer John Persons said, "When I think about that day, the first thing that comes to my mind, well not just me, but the associates and other people at Tops was just the taking of those ten beautiful lives. How we can move forward, how we can honor them, how we can help the community move forward from this."
Tops President and COO John Persons told 7 News' Pheben Kassahun that just this week, Tops unveiled a sign showing what the memorial honoring the 10 lives lost would look like.
It would sit at the corner of Jefferson and Landon.
"We thought there is no better place for us to construct something permanent as a memorial, as an honor space to victims and to the community," he said.
Persons said they are hoping to start construction in June and have memorial ready by mid-fall.
As for employees of the store itself, many are still left dealing with the aftermath of being in the store while the murders were happening.
Persons said, "We have gone through efforts to bring people in after hours, when the store is closed, early morning to just let people kind of get into the store. We're more than happy to do whatever it takes to help people transition back into the store."
Everyone's healing journey has been different.
Fragrance Stanfield, a Tops employee and survivor of the shooting, said she plays music.
Rose Wysocki, who was also working at the Tops on Jefferson Avenue that day stated she likes to garden to keep herself in a positive head space.
Of the 81 associates who were at the store on 5/14, Persons said a majority have come back to work at that location or a different location.
"I did try the day before it opened, I did make it inside but I was stuck in one spot. I needed someone to touch me and walk with me," Stanfield said.
The two sat down with Kassahun to share what the last year has been like.
They said it has been a day-by-day thing for them.
"We're not even sure if we're alive or dead. We're kind of stuck," Stanfield said.
Wysocki added, "We're just going through the motions of life, at this point. I am always looking over my shoulder. A loud noise makes me jump, and I'm looking around. Where'd it come from."
The two share they have been going to counseling and are on medication to help them cope with the trauma they witnessed while in the store.
"I know if I'm having a bad day and I can't cope, I can always call fragrance and she's always there to listen," Wysocki said. "It's about all we can do at this point is hold each other up."
Fragrance has not been able to return to work, while Rose said she did but there were so many triggers that she transferred to a different tops location.
"As time went on, I was just having more breakdowns. When I snapped at a customer, I said, that's it. I have got to take care of myself. That's what I did. I was advised by my psychiatrist not to go back to Jefferson and that there were just too many triggers and this would just continue to happen," Wysocki explained. "We all just went to work that day and our lives were changed forever. Our guests came in that day to buy groceries for their family and their lives have been changed forever."
The two emphasized that mental health needs to be on the forefront.
"Even before all of this, I am sure we all needed some assistance or something. It has kind of uncovered whatever you got going on. If you have new trauma. Deep trauma. It takes over everything else," Stanfield said.
