BUFFALO, N.Y. (WKBW) — If you or someone you know plays soccer in Western New York chances are you've seen Wheatfield native John Netter.
For years, Netter has been a staple in the soccer community, refereeing games at every level, coaching youth soccer, and playing for several indoor and outdoor teams.
"In Buffalo, if you play soccer, you know John," FC Buffalo owner Nick Mendola said.
"Even if he wasn't playing, or coaching, or reffing, he was at Sportsplex working, or doing something that had to do with soccer," longtime friend Trevor Lawler said.
These days, Netter is the goalkeeping coach at FC Buffalo. This is his first season as a coach for the team, but he also played for Buffalo's premier soccer club several years ago. Soccer has been his life, and it's the first word I've associated with someone I've known and called a friend since elementary school.
Bove: When I think of you, the first thing I think of is soccer...is that weird?
"No, because I’d probably say the same thing about myself…and I think for a while when I was figuring stuff out, I think I just made up these scenarios that what people would think about me would be a different word," Netter said.
The word Netter is alluding to is something he kept secret for several years. But that changed in July of last year with a post on Instagram where he came out, or in his words "let them in."
“I just thought If I ever came out, and that has happened, I just thought that people would make that my identity, and I think that’s because when I was younger, I made that other people’s identity, I just tried to hide from it so much that you flipped it almost 360 degrees," Netter said.
Netter shared his story and immediately received support from his peers in the soccer community. It was fulfilling but made him wish he would've shared his story sooner.
“In my head, I think it’s still weird that nobody thinks it’s weird," Netter said. "But I think that’s because of how it was like when I was younger. I didn’t have much representation, like I didn’t have someone that I saw, in the soccer or sports community that was gay, and like me."
That idea of representation is why John is now sharing his story. He wants to help someone in a similar position to the one he was in not that long ago. He knows representation matters, especially in the LGBTQ+ community.
“I think for guys in particular it’s a little taboo still, it’s getting better but if a guy is not doing well it’s, 'well, man up, it’s oh be a man,' and all that kind of stuff," Netter said. "I think that eats at people who are uncomfortable or who don’t have the circle around them that they need.”
Netter has that circle and support from his friends and family. Not everyone does, which is why he believes stories like this matter.
“It’s interesting to me that someone as confident, I just want to use the word confident as self-assured as John was in any way going through something that left him unsure in any way," Mendola added.
“I’m most proud of the fact that he’s willing to set an example and put himself out there," Lawler said. "Because it’s not an easy thing to do, there’s no way it’s an easy thing to do.”
It wasn't easy, but it was worth it. John has found his true self and the people who share the same love for soccer have continued to support him. He's grateful and hopeful his story can make a difference, even if just for one person.
“If I had someone like me when I was younger, and not saying my role models weren’t great when I was younger, but it’s just nobody that I can relate to. I didn’t have anyone who was gay, that was a guy, who was very into sports and was so involved in something that they love. That’s where I was just like if I could help one person with this today, that makes up for it. I’m cool with that," Netter said.
